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BEFORE YOU VOTE


    You can’t just run to the polls when Tuesday comes around- there are preparations you’ll need to make be fore you ever get to the polls. First, and arguably most importantly, make sure you eat before you go. Franklin Delano Roosevelt would not have gotten elected if it weren’t for his weak opponent, Joe Gianthamburger , who was appealing only to the extremely hungry. You will also need the following items: electric blanket, small hamster cage, muffler, extension cord, paper clip, and Joe Lieberman. It is these simple objects upon which Democracy is founded.